How To Stop Beating Up On Myself – Day 9

This post continues Self-Correction and Self-Commitment statements from How To Prevent Myself From Getting Angry At My Child – Day 8.

See How Do I Control My Anger? – Day 1 for the Writing Myself Out part of this point and Why Do I Get So Irritated? – Day 2 through War Within War Without – Day 7 for my Self-Forgiveness process.

When and as I see that I am at that point where I want to make the event/situation stop by reacting and/or releasing my anger, I stop. I see, realize, and understand that all that I am required to do is be here and hear – I do not have to participate.

When and as I see/hear myself showing/telling myself that I am a Bad Parent and/or when, as a result of this, I experience guilt, remorse, and/or sadness, I remind myself that this is not me – that what/who I am showing myself that I am is in direct conflict with who I want to be and to accept and allow myself to participate in the Thoughts gets me caught up and at the mercy of my mind instead of working on practical solutions to become the parent that is best and that I want myself to be. When and as the Thought comes up ‘I am a bad parent because …’, I assist and support myself to release myself from this conflicting information about myself with self-forgiveness and then work on becoming the parent that is more aligned with myself with practical self-correction and then making the decision to walk my correction. Additionally, I see within this that I must pay particular attention the judgments/perceptions/beliefs/and backchat that come up.

I commit myself to stopping my acceptance and allowance of self-judgment, guilt, remorse, sadness, and telling myself the nasty things that I do like ‘I am a Bad Parent that does not deserve children’ by assisting and supporting myself to remove the nastiness and the emotions from myself with writing and self-forgiveness and to investigate, look at, and test out ways that will make me the best parent and human being that I can be.

When and as I hear myself considering allowing myself to be used as a physical ‘punching bag’, I stop. I see, realize and understand that if I allow my child to hit/physically hurt me that I am teaching them that hitting/being hit is ‘okay’. I remind myself of the consequences of allowing abuse of any kind and within this, I no longer accept nor allow myself to offer myself physically to my child or anyone else to let out anger, beat me, hit me, ‘get it all out’, and/or as a punching bag.

I commit myself to no longer allow my child or anyone else to physically ‘let out his anger’ on me. I remind myself that this is how I in-fact teach/show that it’s ‘okay’ to be physically abusive. So, I stop. From here – no more.